Don’t automatically give her more. Resist the temptation to keep feeding her until she refuses to take any more. Remind yourself that she doesn’t have to be “full” all the time.

There is a difference between having enough to eat and being full. She doesn’t have to be so stuffed she cannot swallow another drop.

Encourage breaks during mealtimes. Your baby should not gulp down the entire contents of the bottle in one go without a break. Make sure she pauses every so often. The same applies to your hungry one-year-old.

Avoid using food as a comforter. Try not to give your baby food or sweets whenever she cries.

The chances are that she is not crying from hunger. If you feed her every time she cries, she’ll soon cry just for the sake of getting more.

Instead of reaching for that extra bottle of milk during the night, give her a drink of water. She might only be thirsty, not hungry.

Erika recommends reading to baby regularly, twice a day, every day. Start with a short span of five to six minutes for each reading session and as your baby’s attention span increases, lengthen the reading time.

HOW TO READ

Read slowly and deliberately. Remember you are reading to your baby, not to yourself!

Make appropriate pauses, giving time for baby to look at the pictures.

Repeat key words; point out and elaborate on details, e.g., “This is a cat – a cat says. “meow” or “look at the spider – it is black and has eight legs.” Vary your volume and pace of reading according to the storyline, eg, a louder volume and faster pace for exciting lines in the story.

Talk about what is happening in the story, what happened earlier and what might happen next. These are important concepts for sequencing events and will help your child understand the concept of the beginning, middle and end of a story – prediction is a valuable comprehension skill. Try to make connections between the story you are reading and the world around your baby.

Look for language in her physical movements. Your baby tells you she has a tummy ache by drawing her knees tightly up to her stomach. You can tell she is relaxed when she lies flat on her back, gazing wide-eyed at the musical mobile.

Facial expressions are her way of communicating emotions. Psychologists have identified seven basic facial expressions that adults are capable of generating- unhappiness, joy, surprise, interest, disgust, terror and rage. Your baby too has enough control over her facial muscles to create all of these facial expressions herself.

CRIES

And then there is crying. During this first year, you quickly learn that your baby has different cries to express her different moods and sensations. You will develop an ability to tell one cry from another. It’s amazing how much she can tell you without uttering a word!

Here are some of her typical cries:

“IT’S FEEDING TIME“

This is one of those cries that starts off reasonably quiet, and then gets louder and louder. There are occasional pauses for a few seconds, as she swallows great gulps of air, but the crying is relentless.

“IT’S CHANGING TIME”

She doesn’t like to lie in a dirty nappy, and she wriggles her body about. Her crying is not so sharp because her distress is not so great. She may stop her tears occasionally, but will keep crying until she is changed into a dry one.

“IT’S PLAY TIME”

Your baby can amuse herself to some extent but she needs you to play, tall and interact with her. When bored, she uses crying almost like a shout – it is just to attract your attention.

Three months and over, eye-movements also become part of her body language repertoire. You know exactly what she means when she stares at the biscuit tin, babbles angrily and starts to cry. And when she bangs a toy loudly against the side of her cot, her furrowed expression lets you know she is angry. So make sure that you shop for toys that are durable.

SHE’s NEARLY ONE

By the time she’s one, these are some of the feelings she expresses:

REJECTION

Her hands push the food bowl away. She turns her face away as you raise the spoon to her lips. She’s telling you “I don’t like this and I want something else.”

CURIOSITY

You hear strange noises coming from her cot, and when you get there she’s straining to get hold of something that is just outside her reach.

ILL HEALTH

Lethargic body movements communicate as much as active gestures. If you’re infant is normally very active all the time and full of enthusiasm during her waking hours, then any listlessness should tell you she is feeling unwell.

Your baby’s ability to express her underlying feelings non-verbally creates a strong relationship with you. The more she feels you understand her, the stronger her emotional attachment to you.

Your new baby will also alter your social life. “I hardly go out with my friends anymore, because I have to express my milk every three to four hours daily. Even when I do, I’m often too tired to enjoy the night out. A simple trip to the shops gets tiring when I have to bring along tons of my pumping equipment,” shares Bonny.

And even if you do venture out, your expeditions would most likely be limited to baby-friendly shopping centers with nursing rooms. Karen, 26, a mother of a eight-month-old baby, who even had to change her circle of friends as not everyone fou venues, such as nd “poo” comparisons and diaper brand debates stimulating.

Your life would now literally revolve around your child. Some mothers have found that they even have to cut back on their “me time” for manicures, facials and other little luxuries. “There’s no more sleeping in on weekends, and we no longer take any spontaneous holidays,” according to Karen.

However, it is important to set limits and put aside time for pampering yourself, or even just to get basic sleep and recreation. “The family should offer support, and encourage the new mother to take some personal time off,” advises doctor.

Reality Checking Your Marriage

And Baby does make three, permanently! Be careful riot to become indifferent towards your role as a wife as you pay more attention towards your new duties as a mother. “Asians often have newborns sleeping in the parents’ bed, sometimes even for years! As such, husbands begin to feel neglected,” warns by some doctor, who advises couples to discuss their changing roles and division of responsibilities.

On the other hand, for some mums like Karen, the baby can also create a stronger bond between the wife and husband. “We have more things to talk about, and more decisions to make together. Having a baby increased our sense of inter-dependence and brought us closer together.”

Carry baby in four ways! Newborns can be carried while they lie down as the stiff pouch provides all the necessary support. When baby is older and able to support her neck, carry her facing you or facing front. Toddlers can be carried on your back like a backpack. The side buckles are very secure as they require a (simple) two- step procedure to lock in place. The beige straps are made of a soft cotton material which are soft against the skin but expect them to dirty pretty fast. The biggest drawback is that the instructions are in Japanese so unless you know the language, you’ll be fumbling and making guesswork out of the illustrations.

Ergo Baby Carrier

A breeze to put on with minimal buckling and tugging at straps. Can be worn in front, back and hip position (baby sitting on your hips). A padded seat you secure around your waist supports the baby’s weight through the upper thigh rather than weighing down the spine. as baby is in a seated position. It takes a maximum weight of 18kg so it can accommodate the child from birth through toddler-hood. A sleeping hood keeps the child’s head from flopping about when in slumber.

Jeep 2-in-1 Baby Carrier

This well-padded carrier can take a baby from 3.5 to 11.5kg, in a forward or back- facing position. For infants, you need to make the crotch area shallower. This is done through a zip that comes in two settings. The front of the carrier has reflective strips making it extra safe when you are out at night. A nice touch is the ventilation flap. For more air circulation, unzip the flap and roll-up the portion covering baby’s tummy to reveal a breezy mesh cut-out.

Baby Bjorn Baby Carrier Air

This version of the wildly popular Baby Bjorn is made from a mesh material that dissipates heat and moisture better. You can’t go wrong buckling up as the left and right side of the buckles and latches are color coded (match red to red, blue to blue). A sliding buckle at the crotch area allows you to fit the carrier to baby’s height for a comfortable and safe ride. It takes a baby from 53cm to 90cm in height and 3.5kg to 11kg in weight. Carries baby in a forward and rear facing positions.

Combi Ninna Nanna Carrier

You can carry your newborn in a prone position, upright facing forward, upright facing back and on your back. You can also choose between placing baby’s arms within the armholes or letting them free when she’s older for more mobility. The fabric on this carrier is luxuriously soft, great for baby and you! It takes a while to figure out how to use it but once you’ve got it, it should be a breeze switching from one position to another. Comes in a see-through plastic carrying case so it’s easy to pack away. Maximum weight is 14.9kg.

Mother-care 4 Way Carrier

Made of super soft cotton, this one carries your baby in a forward or rear-facing position, on the back and in a nursing position. There is a removable head support for use with newborns and comes in a hip camouflage print. Additional features: a dribble bib, toy, pacifier holder and a storage pocket. The carrier uses buckles and velcro to fasten. The latter are a little noisy to undo, especially if baby is sleeping. The breathable fabric lining prevents parent and child from becoming too warm. Maximum weight is 12kg.

What’s haunting me is the latter part of the love-hate relationship I have with nursing: leaking breasts the size of watermelons; feeling like I belong on a meadow among the cows; constantly smelling of breast milk; horrible cotton pads stuffed into bras that look like something from Grandma’s underwear drawer; and being the only one who can feed the baby in the middle of the night.

With these memories comes shame. After all, shouldn’t I have moved beyond these mixed feelings? I want to give my third child the same start in life that the first two had — breastfed for six months — yet this time I want to really enjoy it.

If you are feeling this way during pregnancy or encountered difficulties feeding previously, it’s best to get help around 35 or 36 weeks, with enough time to plan before baby arrives. As long as we know a mother’s history, we can talk through her concerns and work out a plan.

For my next baby, I suggest one bottle of expressed milk daily once lactation is established (usually at six weeks). Allowing my family to help with feeding will give me a break. The key to having the baby taking swell to both breast and bottle is being consistent.

If you stop for a week, the baby is likely to revert to just the breast and you could miss your window of opportunity. Being a lactation consultant and midwife makes me a natural breastfeeding activist.

What if I choose not to breastfeed?

We want the mother to breastfeed, but if she is unable or doesn’t want to, then we will support her in her choice. Pony’s response is very much in line with the center’s ethos — support to all mothers, regardless of whether or not they breastfeed.

Still a few months from birth, I am already feeling more relaxed about breastfeeding. I know that however wonderful and beneficial nursing my child is, it’s not a barometer of how much I love him or her.

But finding the balance between too little, too much, and just the right amount can be difficult. Under-stimulation of your baby eventually causes him to be passive and lethargic — lack of toys, games, attention from parents, songs and other play activities has this effect. He quickly adjusts to the status of inactivity. And when he does receive stimulation, he doesn’t know how to react.

Over-stimulation of your baby, however, can be just as detrimental. The chances are that if you expect too much of your baby, you will continue to expect too much of him when he is older, and he may become afraid of failure. By the time he starts school, he could dread the prospect of not being the best pupil in class. Or you might be so obsessed with his intellectual and linguistic skills that you lose sight of his emotional development.

The Best Approach

Of course you want your growing baby to be bright, lively and alert. Finding a suitable level of stimulation is a challenge for every parent.

The best way to know that you’ve got a healthy balance is to watch your baby. If he is motivated, has a sparkling facial expression and reacts positively to you when you play with him, you can be sure you’ve got his stimulation just right.

Here are some suggestions:

* PLAY WITH YOUR BABY EVERY DAY

No matter how hectic your schedule is, you should have at least five or 10 minutes to play a couple of times. More would be ideal, but this should be the minimum.

* DON’T FORCE YOURSELF TO PLAY WITH YOUR BABY

If you’ve had a long, hard day with your baby and feel too tired to play any more with him, then stop.

* ALLOW HIM FREE PLAY

He needs to have times during the day when he explores, plays and discovers by himself, without your involvement or direction. Make sure he has free-play opportunities every single day.

* WATCH THE WAY HE PLAYS WITH TOYS

If you notice that he tends to play with the same toy every single day and that his play is repetitive and lacking adventure, it’s time to get more involved in order to extend his play skills.

* JOIN IN WITHOUT DOMINATING

When stimulating your baby, remember that there is a difference between playing with him and taking over altogether. Offer new suggestions and activities but let him be the one who plays with the toys, not you.

* KEEP IT FUN

Both you and your baby should enjoy your involvement with each other. If the fun goes out of play — either for you or your baby — there may be either too little or too much stimulation.

Because your three-month-old will probably drink every drop of milk she gets, and your one-year-old will most likely gulp down one bowl of cereal after the other without the slightest prompting. The tendency to put on weight is partly an inherited characteristic. Some babies put on more weight than others even though they eat approximately the same amount.

In many instances, obesity is simply due to over-feeding. Research also shows that adults who are fat were more likely to have been fat as babies, when compared to adults who are thin. And the habit of over-eating, which starts during babyhood, can be hard to break later on.

Happy and Healthy But Not Fat

The first step, especially in the first year, is to have a rough idea of the typical food intake for someone her age and size.

You will be able to get advice from your local baby clinic. Of course there are wide variations between babies in terms of weight and food intake, but you should have a guideline regarding her recommended intake of mills (and of solids when she has started weaning).

Weigh her regularly. Your doctor will do this anyway. Doctors know the upper and lower limits of weight gain during each stage of development, and will give you the necessary feedback.

Some adults think that a fat, chubby baby is very pretty. But she is no prettier than a slimmer baby and she is certainly no healthier. In fact, doctors can list a whole series of health problems that are associated with obesity. Your baby doesn’t need to be over-fed in order to look attractive.

My husband and I were delighted with the present because we ourselves were avid readers who had more shelf space for books than clothes, pots and pans, and sports equipment combined. I recalled the warm memories of reading when I was little – skipping along beside my mother as she led us to the Bordland Community Library where my sister and I would spend hours sitting cross-legged on the floor, devouring books of all kinds. As I wanted John to start building similar memories, I began reading to him immediately.

Every night, since he was barely two months old, John and I sit together while I read aloud to him. At first, John would just stare quite blankly at the pages, while I chatted away. But as he got more active and aware, he began to participate in our reading “dates”, charming me by chewing on the books and helping me turn the pages. Recently, eight-month-old John has started babbling non-stop and our reading “dates” have taken on another dimension – they have become opportunities for him to pick up new sounds; for example, by hearing words like “banana”, “bicycle”, and “ball”, he is learning the “b” sound.

In addition, John sees an image of the banana hears the sounds “ba”, “na”, “no” and learns to associate those sounds with the image of a banana. Our regular reading “dates” have been educational, not just for John, but for me as well. I have become convinced that reading aloud to a child, even to a very young child like John, is an important and excellent activity that every parent should try.

The outside is made from hand printed batik (printed in Bali), which has been made waterproof and breathable and leak- free. Inside, soft fleece keeps baby‘s skin dry by drawing pee into the absorbent insert placed inside the pocket of the diaper. Each insert consists of three layers of microfiber terry cloth that can absorb ^-10 times its weight in liquid. Inserts are also anti­allergenic and anti-bacterial. It can be adjusted to fit different sizes. The front panel can be folded down to reveal another row of snaps. Use this row to downsize the diaper for smaller babies.

Bummis Super Whisper Wrap

Made from a super resistant waterproof laminate sandwiched between two layers of soft polyester knit, this one’s made to last through rigorous washing. The outer fabric isn’t as soft as the others, but is slightly stretchy for a snug fit. The comfortable elasticised legs keeps the contents from leaking out. Use it over prefolds, velcroed or snap-closing diapers. Comes in four different sizes to fit babies 4kg to 18+kg.

Mommy’s Touch One Size Pocket Diaper

As it is one size fits all, you can use it to fit any children of different sizes. Two rows of snaps allow you to size the diaper to fit a newborn or a toddler. Adjust the depth of the crotch (or rise) by choosing the top or bottom row of snaps. Extender tabs are available separately to up-size the diaper even more. The outer layer is a polyurethane laminate while the inside is extremely soft micro fleece. The leg casings are elasticized and encased (there is stitching on both sides of the elastic) so that only soft micro fleece touches baby’s legs. It comes in 39 great colors from black to mint.

Bummis Cotton

Use this as a diaper cover with a folded cloth nappy inside to absorb pee and poo or as a swim diaper. To use, place an insert or pre-fold on top of the cover, then baby on top of the insert and fasten. It fastens with velcro, making it a cinch when handling a wriggly baby. The velcro loop panel on the tummy area is wide, allowing a variety of fits. The inside mesh lining increases air flow and helps to hold the diaper in place. Not recommended for night time use or heavy wetters. Can be used as a swim diaper (without any inserts). Comes in fun, cheerful prints, from small to extra large.

Fuzzi Bun

To use, place an insert (or more for longer periods like night time) into the pocket, then fasten around baby. The soft outer material acts as a moisture barrier keeping all wetness and messes inside, hence leaks are prevented. Made of polyester, it’s stain-free, so you don’t have laundry woes. The inside fleece which is in contact with baby’s skin draws moisture away from the baby’s bottom, into the insert. Comes in four sizes to fit 3kg to 16+kg babies/toddlers.

It’s a common sight at the pool and the beach…to see mothers applying sunscreen to wriggling children who are eager to play. But there is something very wrong with this picture. Sunscreen takes half an hour to get absorbed and start protecting your child’s tender skin. So make sure you apply the cream at home and especially for babies it is best to work in the sunscreen before you put on the clothes. This protects the areas where the clothes ride up from getting burnt too. Many parents apply the sunscreen once and think their child is covered unless they have been in the water. Experts, however, recommend that the sunscreen be applied every two hours and especially after each dip in the pool.

Mandy Parkson invested in SPF swimwear for her one­ year-old. “Anything I can do to guarantee he is safe is fine though this is more expensive….I’m even thinking of buying UV protected sunglasses. My family thinks I am either being too fashion conscious or too paranoid but… “She adds. A lip balm that offers a SPF protection of 15 or higher should be applied for children over six months.

For babies younger than six months the safest protection seems to be loose full clothes, a wide brim hat and protection under an umbrella or a parasol. After babies have crossed the six-month mark they can be safely protected with a sunscreen created for children. Doctors also suggest that if a child is on some medication, parents check with the doctor if that medicine could increase sensitivity to sunrays.