Your new baby will also alter your social life. “I hardly go out with my friends anymore, because I have to express my milk every three to four hours daily. Even when I do, I’m often too tired to enjoy the night out. A simple trip to the shops gets tiring when I have to bring along tons of my pumping equipment,” shares Bonny.

And even if you do venture out, your expeditions would most likely be limited to baby-friendly shopping centers with nursing rooms. Karen, 26, a mother of a eight-month-old baby, who even had to change her circle of friends as not everyone fou venues, such as nd “poo” comparisons and diaper brand debates stimulating.

Your life would now literally revolve around your child. Some mothers have found that they even have to cut back on their “me time” for manicures, facials and other little luxuries. “There’s no more sleeping in on weekends, and we no longer take any spontaneous holidays,” according to Karen.

However, it is important to set limits and put aside time for pampering yourself, or even just to get basic sleep and recreation. “The family should offer support, and encourage the new mother to take some personal time off,” advises doctor.

Reality Checking Your Marriage

And Baby does make three, permanently! Be careful riot to become indifferent towards your role as a wife as you pay more attention towards your new duties as a mother. “Asians often have newborns sleeping in the parents’ bed, sometimes even for years! As such, husbands begin to feel neglected,” warns by some doctor, who advises couples to discuss their changing roles and division of responsibilities.

On the other hand, for some mums like Karen, the baby can also create a stronger bond between the wife and husband. “We have more things to talk about, and more decisions to make together. Having a baby increased our sense of inter-dependence and brought us closer together.”

The first shocking realization comes when new mothers realize that they still look six months pregnant after being wheeled out of the delivery room! I remained quite plump for the first two months, and only started to regain my figure in the seventh month.

According to doctor research explains that the amount a mother loses immediately after delivery would depend on the weight of the baby (usually 3 to 3.2kg), placenta (1/7th of the baby’s weight) and amniotic fluid (1 to 1.54); on average, 7kg in all.

“How long she takes to lose all the weight from pregnancy will depend on how much she has gained. So, don’t put on too much weight; 10 to 12kg is just perfect,” says doctor, who recommends total breastfeeding, dieting and exercise after the first six weeks of birth as good ways to regain your svelte pre-birth figure.

Reality Checking Your Emotions

If you are a first-time mum, don’t be surprised if you feel “sad” when bringing your baby home. “Baby blues” is a common syndrome that affects 50 to 70 per cent of postnatal women.

“It usually lasts a few days, in which new mothers experience spells of irritability and gloominess, as well as episodes of crying. More commonly, this afflicts first-time mothers and those who previously had significant premenstrual fluctuations of mood associated with PMS. This is attributed to hormonal changes after delivery,” says doctor.

Some mother even found herself “weepy” during the first month. They worried constantly if their baby was drinking sufficiently or sleeping well, and also felt especially useless when they could not breastfeed their son directly.

Doctor explains that the hormonal changes, coupled with the need to cope with a newborn baby, problems with breastfeeding, and a change in lifestyle, can be very challenging to any new mother, especially if she does not have any support.

“The clash in ideas on how to bring up the baby, the husband going to work, a crying child, and simple issues such as whether to use the supplements that are encouraged by some confinement ladies and grandmothers – all add to the depression,” says doctor, who advises new mothers to read, attend antenatal classes, and seek support from breastfeeding advisers or other mothers from the same generation. However, she cautions that “nothing really prepares you for the real thing”.

“So cliché, you obviously read too many magazines!” scoffed my bemused hubby.

“Well, do you have any better suggestions then,  Mr Computer Nerd?” I challenged him haughtily.

“I’m glad you asked, because as a matter of fact, I do have some ideas that I would like to run by you,” said my husband rather enthusiastically.

The Fantasy Feeling.

I remember feeling a slight twinge of apprehension at this point, and knowing his fascination with anime, I guess I could more or less tell what was coming. What I didn’t know however, was just how elaborate Chris’s fantasy really was.

I suppose you could say that you can’t knock down an idea until you’ve completely heard it out. Trying my utmost to suppress my giggles, I listened to my husband’s plan to dress up as characters in one of his favorite animation series and re-enact a scene whereby I would be “saved” by his heroic character. Like a slick executive trying to pitch his idea, my husband told me his little plan to go somewhere deserted and outdoors to get it on. I must say, incredulous as I was at the sheer audacity of his suggestion, I did feel a slight tremor of excitement as it sounded forbidden, unconventional and pretty sexy and hot.

After much wheedling (yes, grown men do that too!), I finally decided to give it a try late on Saturday night. From what I can recall, I was trudging into a forested area wearing nothing but a strange, skimpy costume and mumbling to my husband, “Oh why can’t you just have that school teacher fantasy like all other guys?”

Finally, we managed to find a small clearing that we deemed secluded enough so that we would not be caught in the act. With my arms tied around the trunk of a nearby tree, we thus began to re-enact the scene whereby my husband’s superhero character would have to come rescue me.

I must say that I felt rather vulnerable standing there in a public space wearing close to nothing, and it was quite a turn on. My heart was pounding wildly against my chest and I began breathing heavily as my husband undid the piece of cloth binding my hands together. After he struggled with the rope for a while, things started getting hot and heavy. Knowing that we might get caught at any minute provided us with that adrenaline rush of excitement that we had never experienced before. Finally, when the deed was done, we quickly dressed and made our way to our car parked nearby, faces flushed with exhilaration and embarrassment.

The End…?

Thrilling as it was, my husband and I decided to limit our role-playing activities to the confines of our bedroom, as what we just did was dangerous, not to mention illegal. Nonetheless, that one time was enough to re-ignite the sparks in our feelings of passion towards one another and things have not been the same since then!

Donny, on the other hand, had something else in mind. Despite his apparently happy family life, he divorced his wife at the end of their first year in Australia. He claimed to have found “the love of his life.”

Stephanie, a former office clerk who gave up her career to support her husband’s work, simply couldn’t believe her ears. “I thought we had a great marriage. He had just recently mentioned that we should go to the Maldives for our tenth anniversary. We were best friends,” she says. Stephanie and Donny were together for fifteen years and were married for over nine of those.

Donny left home the same evening after breaking the news, and Stephanie watched her two children, aged ten and seven, crying in despair. For the first few weeks, she denied the situation, thinking that he was just having “a hard time at work” and that he would return.

A month on and forced to deal with the practicalities of family life on her own, Stephanie found herself relying greatly on her new friends.

“When we live abroad without family and relatives close by, good friends become our real family and baby. I couldn’t have coped without their advice and support, even for things like finding a lawyer. My helper has been like a mother. She has been looking after me and my children with so much care.” So far, Stephanie doesn’t know what the future holds financially for her and the children as she and John have not yet agreed on where the family should live.

“It is difficult for me even to Google ‘divorce’ on the web,” she acids. “I didn’t come to Australia to get divorced.” Stephanie is still coming to terms with her new circumstances. She remembers that she had contingency plans for her husband losing his job, their parents dying or someone falling sick. “But never thought that he would ever leave.”

On a positive note, she says that her children are the most important things in her life and that her happiness comes from within.

Experts believe that children on an average get three times more sun exposure than adults and studies have proven that just one or two sun burns in childhood can double the chances of developing a malignant melanoma. Develop sun sense in your child today and enjoy your day in sheer bliss! So, hope your enjoy your day or family outdoor activities under our lovely sun.

Spontaneity:

Variety stimulates the pleasure centers of the brain, maintaining the climate of romance, writes Professional Advisor.

So steer clear of routine. Full your husband‘s need for spontaneous, and unscheduled, sex by making love in the morning, instead of bedtime. Danger (of being late for work, for instance!) and novelty are two passion triggers that can be tripped very pleasantly by an unexpected roll in the hay.

Visual Stimulation (pretty things):

Men like to look according to Dr. Fisher, with most psychologists agreeing that for men, the visual image triggers romantic passion.

Don’t neglect your physical appearance, and use your looks to your advantage. “I always wear nice lingerie under my business suits,” shares Amanda, 30, “and make sure my husband sees. He loves it!”

Other visual treats would involve making love with the lights on; or in soft candlelight, which will give you a very flattering – and sexy glow.

Letting him take the lead:

Based on a study done by Dartmouth University, women who look men in the eye are perceived as sexier and more attractive. “When someone looks at us,” says study author Malia Mason, “it’s physiologically arousing.”

Try gazing at him over the dinner table…and once you’ve snagged his attention, rev him up even inure by telling him what you’d like to do next.

Learning What Please Him:

This is actually very important to men, who tend to be goal- oriented when it comes to sex. Lou Paget writes, “Granted, most men find the act of pleasuring his partner a huge turn-on.”

So tell him what pleases you, and what doesn’t. Being verbal about what feels good gets the message across in a way that thrills both you, and your partner.

Because your three-month-old will probably drink every drop of milk she gets, and your one-year-old will most likely gulp down one bowl of cereal after the other without the slightest prompting. The tendency to put on weight is partly an inherited characteristic. Some babies put on more weight than others even though they eat approximately the same amount.

In many instances, obesity is simply due to over-feeding. Research also shows that adults who are fat were more likely to have been fat as babies, when compared to adults who are thin. And the habit of over-eating, which starts during babyhood, can be hard to break later on.

Happy and Healthy But Not Fat

The first step, especially in the first year, is to have a rough idea of the typical food intake for someone her age and size.

You will be able to get advice from your local baby clinic. Of course there are wide variations between babies in terms of weight and food intake, but you should have a guideline regarding her recommended intake of mills (and of solids when she has started weaning).

Weigh her regularly. Your doctor will do this anyway. Doctors know the upper and lower limits of weight gain during each stage of development, and will give you the necessary feedback.

Some adults think that a fat, chubby baby is very pretty. But she is no prettier than a slimmer baby and she is certainly no healthier. In fact, doctors can list a whole series of health problems that are associated with obesity. Your baby doesn’t need to be over-fed in order to look attractive.

1. Communication:

According market research, stresses the importance of healthy communication in a woman’s ability to feel romantic. “Women report that they feel more intimacy with a partner when they talk together just before making love,”.

Some author and sex therapist said that most women, in order to share or be open verbally with their partner, must feel safe. Hesitation may come from a fear of hurting a partner’s feelings, especially when the subject is as touchy-feelly as sex.

2. Respect:

In today’s world of equal opportunity, women are working at high-powered jobs and display much self-confidence in the work place; even if that workplace is the home.

Women love a partner who is able to appreciate her strengths and attributes, and aren’t threatened by them. Dr. John Gray, writer of the Mars-Venus series of relationships manuals, points out those women need to be loved and cherished, before they can express love to another.

3. Romance:

Sexologist  theorizes that women typically view sex as pleasure-directed. “Simple acts like cuddling, kissing, and touching are sometimes the end in itself,” she explains.

Just as effective are traditional romantic gestures, such as a surprise dinner date; love notes taped to the fridge, or a sweet SMS that says her hubby is thinking of her in the middle of an important meeting.

4. Grooming:

If men are visual creatures, women tend to be more tactile, turned on by other sensual stimuli such as smell and touch. Women find most irresistible a man who smells clean and fresh, and who takes care of his physical appearance.

“Especially if she shares a bedroom with him! Clutter and poor hygiene are just not sexy,” says Gwen, 28, a model, who’s been married three years.